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Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in jamesfirecat's LiveJournal:

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Tuesday, March 23rd, 2010
1:14 am
Even Daddy's Toys have toys!
Its the little things that make Bioshock 2 so rewarding.

Like getting a Big Sister down to half health and using up all your trap rivets and armor piercing 50 cal ammo in the process, only to be able to actually rope a dope her in to flinging balls of flame a Rosie who up to that point had been just standing around passively until you decided it'd make a good human shield, and then watching that Rosie rivet closed every opening in the Big Sister's body before opening up several new ones with a proximity mine.

That said I have one major complaint against Bioshock two.

The protagonist is right handed.

I am not just bringing this up because I am a lefty.

I'm bringing it up because the main character holds his gun/drill/whatever in his right hand while his left hand uses plasmids.

But, (and this is key) in default set up, your left mouse button fires your weapons while your right uses plasmids. HOW DID THIS HAPPEN? This is an ammo/eve wasting, immersion breaking bit of idiocy that should never had made it past the play testers? Who though it would be a good idea to have a vissual representation of your big honking drill being held in the hand that is furthest away from the button you need to press to swing it?

Naturally I "fixed this" myself by changing the controls, though its still taking me a while to get used to firing guns with my right mouse button now, but at least the gun/plasmid hands match the coresponding mouse buttons.

Honestly do the people at 2K hate southpaws that much that they decided to leave everybody with a nonsensical interface rather than let Delta be a lefty who holds a gun in his left hand (left mouse button) and uses his right for plasmids?
Tuesday, December 29th, 2009
10:42 pm
The most painful and "scary" (in the "oh my god I'm going to die" and requiring a lot of quicksaving and quickloading) part of Bioshock is the very first level and the first half of the second level.

Once you get the Wrench Jockey then you get the "Women", then you get the ADAM!

Seriously, there are no words to describe how big a difference there is between needing six swings to bring down your average splicer, and two....
Friday, November 13th, 2009
1:14 am
Peggle, because lets face it, crack is expensive these days....

Peggle's challenge mode is a lot of fun, irritating but fun, I've already managed to clear out a map with only one ball (you're ussually given ten) and just recently scored this very impressive victory over a comptuer player.

(Computer player starts turn and is up by about 5,000 points)

(Computer player takes a good turn and gets adds another 10,000 points to its lead while also knocking out the second to last orange pin, whoever knocks out the last one finishes the level and gets a chance at a lot more points)

(The problem? The last Orange Pin while located directly south of the launcher has about half a dozen blue pins between it and the launcher at the top of the screen meaning that the only way I'm going to get at it is if I make a really complicated bank shot.)

Me: So that's the way you want to play it is it? Fine then, we'll here's a little move I call "Slam Dunk!"

(Last turn I picked up the fire ball powerup and ts ready to use)
(The Fireball powerup means that my next shot will pass through any and all pins smashing them as it goes)
(I point launcher directly south and fire)
(My ball sails through each and every one of the blue pins)
(My ball hits the last orange pin strainds of "Ode De Joy" fill the air)
(My balls sails right down the open spickoet in the middle section at the bottom of the screen netting me a whopping 50,000 points)

(Game ends with me up by about 40,000 points, challenge completed)

Me: And nothing, but net!

(Another game)

Me: Damn 55 (there are normally 25) Orange Peg challenge... stupid rotating pegs that move form one giganticy large oval making it impossible to get decent bank shots...

(Launches ball)

(Ball bounces around)

(Ball gets stuck in "corner" on one side of the oval)

(Ball slowly rolls forward slightly, brushing up against each individual peg in the oval as it goes)









Me: Oh my god, I broke reality itself!

(Ball eventually falls through gap I already created in oval but with a set up that sweet I manage to clear the challenge with an extra ball on hand)

Thursday, October 29th, 2009
5:38 pm
The little things in life...
Despite the fact that it would probably be a perfect fit I can't find a music video which shows clips of Leverage to Good Charlotte's "Lifestyles of the Rich and the Famous" that makes me sorta sad.

Other than that things are going pretty well here, just thought I should mention that particular fact...
Sunday, August 30th, 2009
3:37 pm
To the internet, the cause of, and solution to, all of lifes problems!

 My computer once more has its sound system running again, after looking for some help online I found out how to uninstal and then reinstall the offending driver which I will never ever again turn off, but hey moral of the story I haven't messed up my computer to the point that I need a new sound card...


Now to see if I can get Prototype's sound to work properly during cut scenes...

Saturday, August 29th, 2009
7:51 pm
From one world of silence to another...
Well this just sucks...

I turned off my sound card as part of an idea I found to get the sound for Porototype to work, and now whenever I try to turn my SoundMax Integrated Digital Audio back on, it causes my computer to freeze up and I've tried it like three or four times.


Moral of the story I see only three ways to deal with this problem...

1: I can try, preferably with the help of my tech savy mom over the phone to disconect my sound card, from my machine while it is off, then boot it up let everything run disagonistiscs, turn it off and reconect the sound card, because in theory it'll that way be automatically in the active position, right?

2: I could buy a new sound card, hopefully one that doesn't feel finicky and make my computer freeze up if I just try to turn it on or off from the control panel menu...

3: I can sit and suffer in silence till I've got a chance for my parrents to look over it personally...


Okay there's a fourth solution but I'd just as soon not have to sit and suffer through calling the windows help line again some things are much worse than having a computer that makes no sound....


What do you guys think I should do?

Friday, August 28th, 2009
11:23 pm
The upcomming future...



Well I'm going back to school tommorrow and when I get there I'll work on something that summed up a lot of what I did during my summer vacation or at least the last week of it, since much of the rest of it was just based around doing semi boring work for $20 an hour.

Now then let me turn over to Alex who'll be recapping what he did this summer in New York in song accompanied by guitar...

Alex: James I've told you before I don't know how to play guitar.

James: Don't worry it's cool, I've got one of those street musicians you see in the subway tied up in the shed out back.

Alex: Hey, assimilating biomass is only one of many options in my metaphorical tool box, there's also immortality.

James: So should we just wait around till you learn how to play guitar?  I mean that'd be mighty boring for all of us...

Alex: (Pause) I'll be out back, this'll take about thirty seconds.

(Twenty seconds later)

Alex: Well that was another hundred and twenty pounds or so that I'll have to work off sometime in the near future.  Now then... (picks up guitar and strums chords) huh, feels just as natural as double parking a tank I got my hands on by bailing out of a stolen helicopter from a hundred feet above it and gliding right down its porthole....

(Starts playing music while walking down badly wrecked streets)

Alex: This was a triumph, I'm making a note here...

(Shot of a morgue lab worker with a note reading "I'M NOT DEAD YET!" driven into his head by his own scalpel)


(Shot of dead soldiers with the words "I'M GETTING BETTER!" Spelled out at their feet in spent bullets fired into the ground)

Alex: It’s hard to overstate my satisfaction....

(Shot of Alex running down a street being chased by helicopters, he isn’t quite outrunning them)

(A helicopter fires a rocket, it blows a car up into the air and it seems like it’s going to land on Alex when it comes back down...)

(Except that he catches it, smiles, and hurls it back at the helicopter causing both to explode)

Alex: Gentek science...

(Shot of a building with the name “Gentek” on it)

Alex: We do what we must because we can...

(Shot of Alex jumping out of the building leaving behind a large hole in the building’s wall)

(He runs back in)

(Cut to a shot of the building with the words “I QUIT SUCKERS!” spelled out on it in holes punched in it except the exclamation point is missing it’s dot...)

Alex: For the gods of all of us, except the ones who are black...

(Shot of a folder marked “Carnival II”)

Alex: But there’s no sense crying over every mistake....

(Shot of Alex walking through clouds of a red mist coughing slightly and then replicating the Chosen One’s feat at the start of Kung Pow (punching straight through someone’s chest) on a nearby solider)

Alex: Just keep on trying till you’ve got a vector that takes...

(Shot of Alex grabbing the soldiers body and countless little tentacles extend from his hands plunging into the soldier’s corpse and pulling him INSIDE Alex)

Alex: But the science gets done...

(Shot of a group of cells on a petri dish starting to multiply, very, very, VERY, RAPIDLY!)

Alex: And you get a subject on the run....

(Subtitles slide out beneath Alex Burn Notice Style reading “Zeus Male Runner..”)

Alex: From the people who are still alive!

(Shot of Alex throwing darts at a board with his former boss’ face on it)

(Cut to shot of Alex jumping off of a roof top, landing on a helicopters wing, ripple a missile off of it,  hanging from the helicopter upside down by just his legs, and then hurling it at a solider on the ground with “predictable” results...)

Alex: (Snarling) I’m not even angry...

(Shot of Alex on a crosswalk when a car comes careening at him, he proceeds to freeze, flip the driver the bird and release a perfectly timed kick at the car’s front bumper that totally caves in the hood destroying the engine in the process)

Alex: I’m being so sincere right now...

(As Alex continues to sing his body begins to get shift and flow taking on countless different appearances before finally turning back into him)

Alex: Even though you broke my back...

(Shot of a gigantic solider built like the Space Marines from Warhammer 40K and about eight feet tall grabbing Alex and slamming his back down onto the soldier’s waiting upraised knee)

Flashback Alex: It’s times like these when I’m glad I’ve got three spines...

Alex: And killed me....

(Shot of Alex flying a helicopter when a message pops up “Now minimal safe distance from Manhattan...”)

(He gets up and kicks off the door to the pilot seat before jumping down to land on an atomic bomb he was towing along with the helicopter out over the ocean, it has 30 seconds left on the timer)

Alex: And tore me to pieces...

(Alex flicks his right hand like a magician except instead of a bunch of roses suddenly a cowboy hat appears in his grip)

(He does the same thing with his left hand which suddenly transforms into a claw)

(He slams the hat onto his head and slashes with the claw at the cables cutting them)

(With twenty seconds left the bomb starts to fall while Alex plucks the hat form his head and starts waving it back and forth happily)

(With ten seconds left it plunges into the water)

Alex: And threw every piece into the fire...

(Ten seconds of silence)

(Shot of gigantic mushroom cloud shooting out of the water)

Alex: As they burned it hurt because I was so happy for you....

(Shot of a piece of wreckage that got washed ashore it has a lot of “black goo” splattered on it)

(A murder of crows lands next to it and one hesitantly plucks at the black goo with its beak)

(More crows start to peck and then start to fight over the stuff)

(The black goo suddenly turns into countless sharpened tendrils which shoot out and impale the crows)

(The crows are then dragged back into the puddle of black goo which grows bigger, and bigger, and bigger until it suddenly turns back into Alex who is nonplussed about the whole thing)

Alex: Now these points of data make a beautiful line...

(Shot of Alex standing in front of a black board with “What the f*** happened to me” written on it...”  he flips it over revealing a gigantic “conspiracy theory” style web  with various people’s faces and lines drawn between them all)

Alex: Yes I’m no beta, this Prototype is fully online.

(Shot of Alex starring down a gigantic slug shooting out of the middle of Time's Square, he just shrugs and suddenly Masamune shoots out his right arm and he charges it)

Alex: So I’m glad I got burned...

(Shot of Alex taking a rocket in the gut it explodes, and is momentarily obscured by a cloud of smoke which he then walks out of, pulls smoking remnants of rocket out of his chest and spits out some shrapnel

Alex: Think of all the things I can learn....

(Shot of a bottle of black liquid slipping from a human hand in the middle of a train station amid the sound of cursing and gunshots)

Alex: From the people who are still alive...

(Shot of Alex walking up to a door wooden, and headbutting it hard enough that the entire thing shatters before walking out dragging a screaming scientist with him)

Alex: Go ahead and flee me...

(Shot of countless doors being locked and people getting in cars to drive away form their homes)

Alex: I think its cute when you try to hide.

(Shot of Alex clinging to the underside of a car being driven by a panicked man)

Alex: Maybe you’ll find someone who can protect you...

(Shot of grateful people being herded into safe houses)

Alex: Like maybe the Blackwatch...

(Shot of soldiers wearing gas masks and night vision goggles dressed in black and white)

(Shots of tanks driving down the streets)

(Shots of helicopters in the air)

Alex: That was a joke, haha!  Fat chance!

(Shot of Alex walking up behind a soldier and tapping him on the shoulder as the man turns around her suddenly notices that Alex’s other arm has suddenly sprouted Masamune which has currently impaled the solider)

(Shot of Alex uses Masamune to slice right through tanks)

Flashback Alex: And those fools said you couldn’t hurt tanks with a katana!

(Shot of Alex jumping onto a helicopter, slicing off the rotor and then jumping off while it plummets)

Alex:  Anyway this ‘cake’ is great it’s so delicious and moist...

(Shot of Alex playfully running his hands along the forehead of a scientists before sucking the entire person’s body into his being)

Flashback Alex: Ahh well aged just the way I like it!

Alex: Look at me still talking when there’s science to do...

(Shot of Alex cutting off his own left hand with a scalpel, then he puts down the scalpel and picks up his dissected left hand with a new one that almost instantly grew out of his stump.  With his right hand he picks up a pencil chews on it and then writes “Now that ain’t right...” on a sticky notes, attaches it to the jar he then puts his old left hand in)

Alex: When I look out there it makes me glad I’m not you!

(Shot of a dilapidated Manhattan with pieces falling off of buildings, and some people looking distinctly “zombified” except with red skin instead of grey.

Alex: I’ve experiments to run....

(Shot of Alex looking a stopwatch as he runs)

(Camera shifts and we see that Alex is running straight up the side of a building without difficulty)

Alex: There is research to be done...

(Shot of Alex scrubbing up and putting on a surgeons outfit)

Alex: On the people who are still alive...

(He then walks into a makeshift “clean room” where he has someone strapped down to a table)

Alex: And believe me I am still alive...

(Shot of one armed general looking away from corpse with a NASTY looking hole in blown in the back of its head)

Alex: I’m doing science and I’m still alive...

(Shot of the ‘corpse’ getting back up and its face knitting itself back together as it shape shifts to reveal Alex)

Alex: I feel fantastic and I’m still alive!

(Shot of Alex cricking his fingers and then holding them out towards a bunch of soldiers.  Each solider suddenly turns into a long tendril and skewers a solider.  More of them come out of a corner behind him, but Alex spreads “wings” made out of more tendrils which impale them as well)

Alex: While you’re dyeing I’ll be still alive!

(The tendrils then begin to “reel in” the soldiers towards Alex)

Alex: And when you’re dead I will be still alive!

(The soldiers bodies vanish inside Alex along with all of their equipment except for their firearms, one of which Alex picks up)

Alex: Still alive, still alive!

(Alex then smashes guitar over his knee, casually walks into a crowd of people we see his shape start to blur and then it becomes impossible to keep track of him)



Oh and on another good for me I finally managed to fix the problem I was having and now I can replay the game with freaking sound this time around!

Tuesday, April 21st, 2009
8:07 pm
To Absurdity and beyond!
For my final in my zen class I need to write a ten page paper on something/someone having to do with Buddhism.


What's my paper going to be?


The underling Zen message of Groundhog Day with bill Murry.

Just thought you'd like to know.

Saturday, February 14th, 2009
12:19 pm
Still alive...

The cake may be a lie but the following isn't, I just managed to beat Portal all on my own my own.


In the words of Yahtzee it does in fact feel good to know that bits of my brain besides the usual: run, shoot. kill and......   haven't turned black and dropped off yet!

Saturday, December 6th, 2008
9:45 pm
Fallout three, the real good ending....

Many people consider Fallout Three’s ending (I among them) to be a the equivalent to a kick to the nuts from someone wearing steel toed shoes.

Well as my free gift to Bethesda for an otherwise very good game, here’s my version of the ending which would have made so MUCH MORE SENSE!

Don't click here if you can't take the spoliers captain!Collapse )Don't click here if you can't take the spoliers captain!Collapse )


See how much better would the game be if it had that for an ending?

Sunday, November 30th, 2008
9:11 pm
A preview of coming distructions...
(James closes door behind him)

James: So I need to put this little device in the middle of the Mirelurk spawning grounds, and ohh yeah, what was the optional mission? (Checks wrist mounted computer) "DON'T KILL ANY MIRELURKS" well that can't be too hard... can it?

(James looks up and sees three Mirelurks hissing at him)

James: Um, I hear that you're intelligent, I come in peace?

(Mirelurks advance)

James: Right them, ummm game breaking backup?

(Camera stills and zooms in on Mirelurks to show chances of hitting them in their unarmored faces)

James: Not that.

(Camera zooms back out)

James: THIS!

Yakity sax (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KkxdE4OEYEQ) plays...

(James runs to a door, down some stairs, onto a catwalk and finds himself face to face with more mirelurks)

James: Ulp!

(James jumps off the catwalk and lands in the water)

James: The spawning pond! (Hides device in it and climes out of the water, just in time to come face to face with another Mirelurk) Not again...

(Mirelurk slashes at him while James backpedals right off of the catwalk and into a wide open room with only one door shot of James getting chased around by mirelurk until James manages to duck through the door and shut it in the mirelurk's face)

James: YES!

(James is face to face with all the mirelurks he managed to avoid by jumping of the catwalk which have now made their way down to his level)

(Yakity Sax ends abruptly)

James: Ohh boy... looks like I'm gona need to reload that quicksave....

Fallout Three, Firecat edition...
Friday, October 31st, 2008
9:05 pm
I've yet to hook my Wii up today but I decided to take a trip down Nostaliga lane.

Once upon a time there was a game called Earth Bound, which was so good that I made a plot ark based on it, it was so good that Yahtzee declared it the only Japanese RPG he likes playing like a mix between the Charlie Brown show and the Cuthulu (or however you spell it) Mythos.

I've played through it a few time.

Once upon a time there was a game called Mother Three which was a sequel to Earth Bound (itself a sequel to a game never released in America) that Japan in aparantly still peaved about the entire A-bomb thing (I jest) decided never to release in America.

Once upon a time game developers realized that all it took to make level grinding seem like fun simply by having whacky enemies like rodents with wings and trippy backrounds to draw you in like a suck-o-mattic 5,000.

Once upon a time people realized that the characters in Earthbound moved a little slow, so they created a dash button to let you zip around the screen.

Once upon a time people realized that you could make RPG combat intersting through simple things called action commands.

Once upon a time people realized why making action commands so ingrained by having you hit the right button right before the attack lands when they could give each monster an individual team and make you hit the attack key in turn with if you wanted to deal extra damage?

Once upon a time because no one is perfect people took away the useful mechanic for level grinding where if you were going to win a fight automatically then the screen just flashes "You win" before giving you XP and goods.

Once upon a time there some brave rebel spirit who fought against the Empire of the rising Sun by translating this game into English.


Once upon a time I had the foresight to make sure to end my LJ post before I gave out links to things like where to find emulators or ROMs online....
Monday, October 20th, 2008
6:19 pm
Putting things in perspective
Four years ago a great thing happened, the Red Sox came from behind and made their bitter rivals the New York Yankees take part in a vicious FOUR GAME CHOKE that lead them to the world series which they proceed to win like the Carindals were in fact Turkies.

It was great, really.

But something very bad happened in the year 2004. The United Sates of America, for whatever reason, Elected George W Bush to four more years of Presidency, that's why we're still in Iraq, hell that's why people still say that Iraq is the frontline of the war on Terror when.. well lets not get into that.

Lets look at what brings us together. And there is something that even Yankees and Red Sox fans can probably agree, on. You see the state of New York, and the State of Massachusetts, hell the entire Red Sox nation went as blue as you could please during the election of 2004.

So yeah the Red Sox lost this year and it was a proper Red Sox loss this year, we did not get steamed rolled, we fought to the last out, made some amazing moment, raised the tempo the highest it could go... and then fell short by that much.

But let remember what matters, the Election. It won't be decided by two teams of 18 men, we can all get invovled in it, we can all (who are citizens living in the US and over 18 years of age) vote. Of course that said I live in Maryland, so yeah my vote doesn't count for "that" much but whatever even I can cast a vote to keep my blue state blue.

President Bush claimed to have a Mandate after 2004, he won by 34 votes, or 16 fewer for them, 16 more for us and things would have turned out differently. They call that mandate? Ha! In 1996 Bill Cliton won 379 to 159 votes! In 1992 he won 370 to 168. Those my friends are what we call Mandates.

If we had won Ohio, if we had won Florda, if we had won (snerk) Texas... okay maybe not that last one so much but still.

North Carloina is in play in this election, Virginia is going as the meenies say "Blue!" Ohio is bluish. We're making inrodes in New Mexico and Colerado, who are both worth 14 points put together. Iowa, is going blue, blue bluer and it's worth seven votes.

The Republicans? NH and it's 4 votes is only light blue. They've got nothing new 90% of George Bush a tonic that I'm sending back. Come on democrats, lets go win one that really matters!
Saturday, October 18th, 2008
11:57 pm
The Boston Red Sox are a team of Masochists cheered on by biggest group of masochists you'll find out side of the wrong kind of club, or a monistary that pratices self flagragation.

You see I can explain how this happened, we beat them that first game just to show that we could, then we proceeded to show throw the next three games, just to make Tampa Bay think that the were about to get to home base with that sweety lady known as the world series, then we yank him up by the scurff of his neck, and dump him in a trashcan.

Serriously it's like the Red Sox can't win an ACLS recently without getting in a horrible hole, and then we go onto sweep the world series like it ain't no thing, let's watch those national leaguers try to hit our knuckle balls!
Wednesday, October 15th, 2008
12:12 am
Hobbies are the spice of life
And I've got a new one, from now on every time I go to the bathroom I'm going to Rickroll everyone in there.

Come on sing along!

Never gonna give you up, never gona let you down...
Saturday, October 11th, 2008
12:05 am
It's starting to look a lot like October
What do you mean?

Really play offs already?

Looks like it time for me to stick out my thumb and hitch a ride on the Red Sox bandwagon.

Oh and hey 'we' just won the first game of the ALCS, go us!



Monday, October 6th, 2008
8:02 am
Firecat's guide to health, or when you've only got 8 lives left...
To my recolection there is a maximum amount of discomfort that the human body can be in. I'm pretty darn sure that its true, because discomfort is caused by certain neurons firing in the brain.

Thus, sometimes the best way to deal with your discomfort is not to go lay down, but to go for a walk. I refer to this particular approach as "playing checkers and chess with Death" where in because you're creating several different zones of discomfort, if nothing else you can take your mind off of what is screwing with you in the first place.
Saturday, October 4th, 2008
7:35 am
Everything comes down to, well if you've sen Scrubs you know.
Not in the best of shape at the moment, I'm pretty sure I've been drinking a bit too much water sort of like the first day at Lenhoxen if you get my drift, luckily I don't plan to go up and down up and down any mountains at the moment (and I especially don't intend to go swimming outside with my shirt off without putting suntan on) so I'm pretty sure I've seen the worst of my condition.

Mainly because being a member of America's "I want it now crowd" I at once dug through the first aid kit I'd brought with me and took two Peptobismal.

Now on one hand having it in swalloable pill form saves me from the taste which I don't exactly remember fondly. But for some reason despite the fact that they're more or less the same size as my normal ADHD meds, which I can now get in one gulp every time, I had to take about five drinks of water before I was finally able to get the second pill down my throat.

Moral of the story, today is hopefully going to go up from here.
Friday, October 3rd, 2008
11:23 am
Daily show

The segment with John McCain that starts around 2:30 is hilarious, but also reminds me of the sad truth "I don't know how many house I own" is not hitting John McCain because he's rich, its hitting him because he's old and at that age when some people's minds start to go, and America doesn't need a president who can't remember where her put that gosh darn "football" with all our nuclear launch codes in it.

But hey it's an unfair joke, because Golum is an old man corrupted by his quest for ultimate power, and.......
Wednesday, October 1st, 2008
11:35 am
Life is good
Well after some intensive studying I more or less breezed through my first Econ exam, which makes me very proud because that was the one class I was rather worried about how I'd do in.

Really after that everything in life sort of looks wonderful.

Somebody remind me to buy some popcorn tommorow because for the first time in my life I think I'm actually going to watch something politically important of my own free will without using the lens of the daily show.

Granted its going to be the Vice Presidential Debates between Sarah Palin and Joe Biden, so something tells me their will be plenty of humor to go around...
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